


Say something already.

by SpiffyMolotovMouse



Category: Wentworth (TV)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-01
Updated: 2017-03-01
Packaged: 2018-09-27 17:19:55
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,924
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10035974
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SpiffyMolotovMouse/pseuds/SpiffyMolotovMouse
Summary: After Bea's death, what's happening to both women after everything. Joan and Vera needing to speak up already to each other, the hurt is too much to bare any longer.





	

**Author's Note:**

> It's been way too long..... kudos and opinions are greatly appreciated! AU elements on what's going/what has gone on with Miss Bennett and Miss Ferguson.

Bea Smith's death happened two weeks ago, and major shit hit the fan. Vera was being questioned on how and why, Bea was even able to get out, If she was in-fact behind trying to get Joan Ferguson killed, then Joan was being questioned on behalf of Smith's murder, and so on. Vera had taken a two week leave while Will Jackson was riding out his suspension and Jake took over as Governor for the time being. Miss Bennett had no idea what had happened between Jake and Joan, she had no idea he was also making it seem as though the two had sexual relations going on during everything that happened up until now. Vera was very much alone as always, and even more so now knowing she was more than likely going to be sent into prison, surely lost Ferguson forever and her career was ending for good. Nothing should've taken place the way it did, it was never wanted. She had to play the part of hating Joan more than anything so nobody would catch on to the endless love the younger woman had for the older one, even though Joan had broken her heart in so many different pieces. It was the kind of love that made her head spin, heart and mind literally hurt. Vera never would've had a therapist murdered in order to grant /Joan's safety/, or go through the entire process of being questioned just to do everything in her power to not allow the Russian back behind any prison walls. All she wanted was Ferguson, even as a true friend if given the opportunity and that is all she could have. But everything was now doomed, and the little lady was barley holding on by a thread anymore. 

Joan Ferguson had been in her own home, her own bed for the past two weeks awaiting to get a call on whether or not she'd be fully charged for Smith's murder or not. Plain and simple playing the waiting game, a game the Russian had grown way too familiar with than she'd like, than anyone would like. She was still determined to gain her job back as Governor at Wentworth correctional centre to not only gain revenge, but to make her point clear that she had won as always. At the same time though, those two things hadn't been at the top of her priority lists. Vera, her former Deputy she grew so fond of, so drawn to and hurt over more than words could ever describe was however. All she did was go over the dinner both women had that turned everything ugly from there on out, how it could've gone different, what exactly went so terribly wrong. Joan wanted to tell the woman that night how she felt, that she was in love with her and had been for so long. But the way Vera acted caused everything to be pushed back, make the Russian build a guard up and bring out her hatred, her defense net instead of forcing herself to be the voice of reason the way she wished it went. It made her terrified not knowing if she'd ever be granted the chance to tell Vera Bennett how she truly felt no matter what happened, just so the truth could be set free before it was too late. There didn't seem like a way around it though, except sipping down one too many shots of Vodka to semi block out the uncontrollable pain never ceasing within herself. 

It was around eleven at night, Vera was sitting in her living room lost in her thoughts again, sipping on wine and taking pain pills to feel anything but “normal”. In just a two week span, everything changed, the current Governor going down a dark and endless path, not caring to even dig herself out of the foot grave she was already in and becoming more farther in as the minutes and hours faded on by. She either cried, screamed, or numbed herself the best she could awaiting for what was to happen next, awaiting if she was going to grow the courage to check out early so she could finally find some peace, eternal peace to set her free. Miss Bennett wasn't thinking correctly, and began to freak out over such guilt and sadness. The 5'2 woman picked up her iPhone, staring at Joan's name and number and without a next thought, sent a text message in a slurry state of mind. 'I'm sorry for everything. I will love you forever.' and clicked send. It took her about five minutes to even process she sent something, before a response chimed in. 

Ferguson was laying upon her couch, thinking as always and drinking herself into a drunk state, the best she could anyways being Russian and such. There was no real point in fighting anymore in the world when there was nothing you had to lose, that was something Miss Ferguson had grown to think over above all else within the past few weeks. It was a dream to be someone different, however the amazon had no idea to be anything but whom she always had been. So many things thought of by everyone else, thinking of her as this monster who did nothing for the grater good, thinking of her as someone filled with perversion that had relations with a girl whom was nothing more than a little sister back in the day, Jianna. So much hate held for this destroyed and broken woman that every single person went so far to exaggerate truth, make anything she ever did that was minor into something insulting or distasteful. She began to fall into a slumber before hearing her phone go off, the moment she opened it her heart dropped seeing a message from... her Vera. Her hands began to shake, not knowing what to do nor say considering what the message contained. Was this a joke? Was it some sort of sick prank? But what did she have to lose truly anymore whether it was or was not? So she replied 'Interesting choice in wording for someone who tried having my life taken just two weeks ago little Vera..” 

Vera was so angry at the response she opened up, feeling humiliated and betrayed yet had to stop and remember that not only Joan, but everyone else was under the impression she attempted to have the notorious Joan Ferguson murdered by lifer Bea Smith. Tears came forth into her eyes and she just let it all out, drowning in her emotions and now tears, so broken, so lost. She took another pill desperate to feel /nothing/. 

Joan began to breath heavily, anger fueling her to the point it almost felt like she hadn't even had a drink. She rose immediately, grabbing her car keys and jetted off to Bennett's house. Determined to gain answers at once, no games, utter and complete hurtful truth. She arrived in exactly ten minutes and thirty seconds, walking up to the door pounding four times harshly.   
-

Bennett was near dream land before shaken out by the pounding, jumping off the couch nearly falling on her face. She had no idea who it could be, forgetting the two even messaged each other minutes ago. Vera slowly yet quickly got to the door and when she opened it, she took a few steps back in utter shock, breathless.

Ferguson arched a brow, taking a deep breath before crossing her arms tightly against her chest feeling her own heart beating roughly. “Hello, Vera.” Joan stated smugly, holding back tears in the back of her skull and doing her best to keep her breathing at bay. “Do you wish to tell me something, something that holds of some truth?” She asked, her face tightening up even more, gritting her teeth taking a step forward.

Vera had no idea what to say, besides taking one step back even more and trembled slightly. “What exactly are you getting at?” The small woman asked in an angry tone, crossing her own arms becoming more than fed up with this. “What TRUTH, would YOU be speaking of, Joan?” She asked, taking a few steps forward now becoming bold, feeling the substances in her blood help. 

Joan didn't move, and stepped forward once more the two almost pressing together. “Why on earth would you send me a message during all times, saying such....things.” She asked shaking now, emotional corruption written all over her face. 

Miss Bennett looked into her eyes, tears forming but being held back the best she could. “And why are you so eager, to jump that what I said is lies?” Vera asked in such an angry yet broken tone, stepping back and shaking her head, done with this and all the horrendous it brought. “it was a mistake to send, clearly. Tis' why things could neva' be spoken of” She scoffed and turned away hatefully, marching to the couch not even caring anymore, sitting down.

Joan scoffed shaking her head, kinking her brow again and before she could say anything her mouth slightly dropped as Vera had the nerve to walk away from her while they were speaking on behalf of serious things. “ex--” she began but stopped, welcoming herself inside the small woman's home and slammed the door behind herself following. Her heart was racing, seeing Vera in person outside of the prison in so long made her emotions all over the place. All she wanted was to embrace the little lady, kiss her, tell her the truth, find out if it was somehow mutual, love her, so much more. 

Vera jumped hearing the door, not knowing Joan had just strutted inside but of course should've been more prepared for that considering this was Joan. “Well, make yourself home. “ She said sarcastically rolling her eyes and sat back in an irritate state, shaking her foot a nervous wreck. 

Ferguson took a deep breath, nostrils flaring walking up to the younger woman standing in front of her. “What is this!?” Joan roared, a few tears falling without her knowledge. “Why did you message ME first?! Why did you say what you said?? Say it to my face, what you really are thinking and feeling, Vera! Don't be such a coward!” The Russian yelled more, shaking this was effecting her so badly. 

Vera's mouth dropped in shock, Joan always making her nervous when yelling but this time, it drove the younger woman into a defensive state rising to her feet. “Don't tell me to do something you don't mean, JOAN!” Vera yelled back, nearly spitting accidentally. “I am sorry for what I've done! I meant it when I bloo'y said I'll love you foreva'! Alright?! HAPPY!? Make ya feel more powerful now, huh?!” Bennett yelled in a more crying state now, sniffling and backing away. 

Joan stood there in shock, mouth opening up and closing like a fish. Did Vera really just say all this? She had no idea how to even respond. Her heart melted even though it broke, sensations flooding her nerve system in ways it never had when it came to another person wanting to so badly just kiss this woman and tell her it was mutual, tell her she was so sorry. How could she? When Vera seemed to hate her so much? Ferguson within instinct began to slowly lean forward towards Miss Bennett, unable to form words it was so hard, so emotional and she only ever felt emotion with Vera.


End file.
